Time out.

Well I don't know what happened there. I seemed to disappear for almost 2 weeks! I wish I could tell you I had jetted off for an exotic holiday, or that I made a conscious decision to un plug myself from the internet in order to devote myself 100% to my wonderful family.

I didn't.

I have just had nothing to say!! Shock shock! That is not like me!

I have just been lazy, reading other peoples words, hardly even commenting. I can't seem to string a sentence together at the moment, whether it be spoken or written. My brain has shut off.

I still have nothing to say, but my fear is that if I don't even try to write , it may never come back! My darling husband had also mentioned the presence of tumbleweeds rolling through my blog, so I figured some words were better than none!

Through my laziness and inability to finish sentences and remember the words for simple things, I have actually managed to work towards two of my New year's resolutions. Unfortunately for my poor long suffering husband, it isn't the being more organised one!

I have successfully re-joined my slimming class and have lost 5lbs so far.
 I have organised my girlies to consider walking the moonwalk this year to raise money for breast cancer. This is to give me a goal to work towards, if I don't set one then I wont get off my fat buttsky and actually move! So the idea of walking 13.1 miles in June should spur me off the couch and onto the pavements!

I have managed to see a bit more of some family and friends, not only have I met up with them, we have also pencilled in the next get together so we don't reach summer and say - hmm I wonder where all of that time went!

K and I are going away for a girly weekend! We leave early on Thursday morning, or as K says
 " weally eh-uh-lay". It is always more exciting to leave for the airport while it is still dark, don't you think?

We are heading to Belfast, Northern Ireland to stay with our friends. One of my best friends, Heather, completely and totally abandoned me, leaving me feeling unwanted and unloved and without a friend to have coffee with and eat danish pastries with every day and moved back home to Belfast. Our girls were best friends and we all haven't seen each other since April last year!

I'm not sure I'm ready for what she has in store for me! But I will share what I can, so long as there isn't too much tequila involved ...........

All of this taking time and thought for myself has been fun! I even managed to get a haircut (which I love!!!) and bought myself a couple of new things to wear. Having my hair cut has just made me feel like me again, I hadn't even realised that I wasn't feeling like myself.

Inevitably, the mummy guilt is starting to set in , time for me means time away from everyone else. But I feel like I need it at the moment, which will surely benefit us all in the long run. I hope!

And the boys will have fun this weekend right? A boys weekend filled with video games and a lethal weapon movie marathon will keep them smiling I'm sure.

Hopefully this rambling nonsense will stop the tumbleweeds for a few days and maybe the next time I blog will be from the emerald isle!

Playing hooky.

Do you ever read something that just resonates with you. Just nestles down in your brain and you just can't shake it? This happened to me after reading a blog post in December. Well, really just the essence of the blog post. I'm sure the blogger really needs no introduction, Kelle Hampton, from enjoying the small things. I like reading her blog, it is a little guilty pleasure I have.

In December she wrote about feeding the wolf. The quote , she used, just stuck in my mind.

There is an ancient Native American story about an old Cherokee who told his grandson about the battle that goes on within us. "My son," he told him, "Inside every one of us dwells two wolves, one evil, one good. The evil one is angry and jealous, full of regret and arrogance, greed and sorrow, guilt and self-pity. The other is good. He is kind and loving, full of hope and peace, joy and compassion."
The young boy thought about it for a moment. "Which wolf wins?" he asked his grandfather.
The old Cherokee smiled and simply replied, "...the one you feed."

I have a day off work today. I had a huge plan of what I was going to do. I was going to tidy and clean K's bedroom, find a place for all of the toys she received at Christmas time and move the furniture around a little. I would hoover my floors and scare them with the mop for a change. I would use this time practically , sensibly.

This morning I woke up to a grey , rainy day. A grumpy boy and a loud and slightly crazy girl. I have come down and sat at the laptop to drink my cup of tea and eat breakfast.

The sky is clearing, the day is looking brighter. So I have decided I am going to play hooky. I'm gonna grab my best girl, we are gonna head out somewhere for a girly morning. Peeking into shop windows and maybe a bite out for lunch.

Then I am going to drop her off at nursery and I am going to visit with my Joe boy and breathe in his yumminess.

I am going to feed my good wolf.

I don't know how to have a house that isn't full of toys and laughter, crumbs and scraped knees. My home was full from the start. I am more than ok with that! Tidying my house just doesn't feed my soul in the same way as impromptu mornings out with my girl.

There will be many years ahead of me where all of the rooms in my house are tidy and organised. Where things will still be where I left them, where everything will be as it was when I left for the day.

The thought of those days make me want to enjoy these days even more.

So I am taking my last sip of tea, I am going to grab my handbag and my girly girl and we are off to find some moments that will feed my good wolf. He is hungry.

 

I may have gone and done it.

Every year I choose a special Birthday dress for K. It is given to her as part of her gift. And in the world of Kirsten, a pretty dress may be one of the best gifts there is.

This year, I am going to attempt to make this very special dress.

But in planning to do so I may have made a fatal error.

I have resisted the temptation for the year and a half that I have been sewing.

I am afraid that I may have unleashed a beast, have started on a slippery slope.

I will whisper just two words

Amy Butler.

**Sigh**

At least I can remember what I bought it for!

In the haze.

I am thankfully feeling a lot better today. Still not 100% but somewhat human. I have been able to climb back onto the Hamster Wheel and it feels oh so good.

It is nice to be sat at my kitchen table again , instead of laying on the couch. A warm drink in my hand and a tub of grapes (replacing the biscuits) for some snacking while I read through my blog list.

I have been unable to sleep the past few nights, not being able to breathe if I was anything but bolt upright, kind of made it tricky to tip myself into slumberland. So as I lay there trying to drift away, my silly silly brain starts thinking of all the fun projects I could get up to. I am at my most creative while I can't do anything about it! I then feel a little cheated when life gets back to normal and I don't ever find the time to do these "amazing" projects.

Apparently at some point in this haze, I decided upon an ingenious project. I am sure it was something that just popped into my head. Like a lightbulb going off!

Photo sourced through google images

 I probably pressed and stitched every seam in my mind , all the while wishing I was able to jump up and get going.

I really should sleep with a notepad by the bed. I really should have written down this idea. Because for the life of me I can't remember what it was! It had to be a corker though, because I just received an email to say that the 3 metres of medium weight , white, iron - on ,fusible interfacing that I ordered, has been shipped. Ha ha ha! I have no recollection of ordering this! But there it is. In My ebay, paid for through paypal and everything!

Does anyone have any suggestions as to what I may have been creating in my crazy sick person haze??

Lying low

I'm sick. Again.

I have been more sick this autumn/winter than I have been for a long time. This time it's tracheitis and not tonsilitis. You know, just for a wee change.

I've been doing lots of laying on the couch under my quilt that I FINALLY finished!

Probably some master quilter would have a fit if they stumbled across this quilt!

I wanted it to be completely random but  co ordinating. I made it up as I went along.

But is is so warm, comfortable and it looks ever so cheerful, don't you think?

Lying on the couch all day leaves plenty of time for catching up on everyone else's blogs and even adding some new ones to my list.

Hopefully I'll have something to write about soon.

Oh and I think I have decided on a name for my new girl .............

Ina.

It just had to be!

I'm  off to bed now, with a warm drink.

A new era.

I am excited. Scratch that. I am so over the top, wiggly, jumping, feels like Christmas all over again, I can't believe this day has finally come, excited.

I am happy.

There are very few material posessions that I have coveted.

Designer handbags and shoes? No thanks

Designer clothes with huge price tags? No thanks
Expensive perfumes? Not for me.

One of these was an item I dreamed of owning since I was a very little girl.  Seriously this was my dream for as long as I can remember. I was super lucky that my Mum and Dad gave me this very special gift when K was born.

It was, of course, my silver cross pram. I was so happy and so proud pushing my precious little angel in my precious pram.

Aww look how tiny she was??

I lived my dream of pushing my very own baby in my very own silver cross pram. I was contented.

Another of my material must haves , has been a dream for quite a few years now. I never did think that I would ever actually own one!

At the tail end of last year something very sad happened. My poor hand mixer passed away.
One day it just stopped.
I was sad because this mixer belonged to my Gran. She was a keen baker and prolific scone and Apple pie maker! When she died , I inherited her baking bowl, her mixer and rolling pin. (I also inherited a tupperware tub. I keep my pegs in it. I have fond memories of playing in my Granny's kitchen with all of my cousins and of course my sister. We would play with the pegs, tubs of cards and tubs of dominoes.For hours.)

Anyway, when my mixer died, I was heartbroken! It was like losing a part of my Gran all over again.
I cried. I called my Mum to tell her and we both cried.  My Mum knows how much we love to bake and a mixer is a fairly integral part of this. So she told me that it was time to say goodbye to the old and order myself a new mixer.

I am turning thirty this year! (woo hoo!) and my mum had 9very kindly) plannned to give me something extra special to mark this special occasion. Something I have always wanted and something I will get a lot of enjoyment from.

She told me to order it up and I could have it early.

And I did.

And she came.

And she is very beautiful.

And she is very red!!!!!!

K and I are truly in love with her and can;t wait for all of the new memories that she will hold.  For us, and if I look after her, maybe even my own Grandchildren!!

Thank you Mum and Dad.

I can't believe all of my material dreams have offically come true!

x x x x

Here we are! Back at the start.

 With a fresh year already laid out in front of us, just waiting for us to live it.

2010 was a good year for us, I am sure every year will come with it's trials , 2010 certainly had them. But I can count many more blessings in there!

This year I hope to enjoy more fun with my special family. I will try to be the very best person that I can be.

I have just a few resolutions!

To lose weight (again, I know LOL but I am trying to go with last years resolution and not beat myself up over the fact that I have gained everything I lost last year!! )

To be more organised, I have come a long way in some areas but there are great big mountains still to climb!

To be more present with my family, to switch off the TV and get other kinds of busy with them.

To keep in touch with my real life friends more.


I want to thank everyone who reads all of the random crap   ramblings that I offer on here.  I have met some very sweet people and made some good friends through my little blog and your comments mean the world to me. I look forward to a new year of sharing with you.

I am raising my polka dot mug to you all and wishing you a very happy new year.
May 2011 be filled with health, love and happiness for you all.

And there's a hand, my trusty fiere!

And gie's a hand o' thine!

And we'll tak a right guid willy waught,

For auld lang syne.